30 MINUTES OR LESS

Written by Michael Diliberti

Directed by Ruben Fleischer

Starring Jesse Eisenberg, Aziz Anzari, Danny McBride and Nick Swardson

Dwayne: Sometimes fate brings out it's big, old c@#k and smacks you right in the face with it.

I’ve decided that, in the spirit of the title of this film, I’m going to dedicate no more than 30 minutes to writing this review. In actuality though, my decision has very little to do with the title. I don’t want to dedicate any more time than this to Ruben Fleischer’s (ZOMBIELAND) second film because 30 MINUTES OR LESS plays out like he didn’t spend any more time than that on it either.

First of all, the title itself has nothing to do with this movie. Nick (Jesse Eisenberg, looking particularly pale) is a pizza delivery man-child who never meets his “30 minutes or it’s free” guarantee. He gets jumped by a couple of wannabe thugs (Danny McBride and Nick Swardson) in ape masks and when he wakes up, he has a bomb strapped to his chest. He must then rob a bank and bring back $100 grand to them so that they can in turn pay a hitman (Michael Pena) to kill one of the thug’s controlling father (Fred Ward). You would think he would have all of 30 minutes to accomplish this task but really he has 10 hours. The suspense is pretty much cut out of this picture right there.

Nick is joined by his reluctant best friend, Chet (Aziz Ansari) and they get to work through their growing pains together while they bond in this experience. The cast is solid – Ansari’s deadpan delivery is always brilliant and McBride redeems himself to me after his disastrous turn in YOUR HIGHNESS – but their random moments of mild hilarity are not enough to make up for how paper thin and half-assed this film truly is. Essentially, 30 MINUTES OR LESS will be forgotten just as quickly.

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THE SOCIAL NETWORK

Written by Aaron Sorkin
Directed by David Fincher
Starring Jesse Eisenberg, Andrew Garfield and Justin Timberlake

Mark Zuckerberg: There is a difference between being obsessive and being motivated.

With over 500 million members worldwide, Facebook has come a long way since it was just a little social networking site kicking around a few prestigious colleges in the United States. In fact, I remember quite vividly when I first heard about it. It came out of nowhere and suddenly everyone I knew was asking why I wasn’t on Facebook yet. I actually held out. I had done Friendster and Myspace. Why did I need this new network to come into my life so I could feign the idea of closeness with people I had neither seen nor thought of for years? For days, I cursed it to anyone who would listen. This made it particularly difficult when I actually joined Facebook a few weeks later and started inviting all the people I had complained about it to, to be my friend.

THE SOCIAL NETWORK, or what is affectionately known as “The Facebook Movie”, is not about a bunch of bored office workers or late night loners wasting hours of their lives on Facebook. That’s about all it isn’t about though. Screenwriter, Aaron Sorkin, has taken the real life story of how Facebook came into existence and turned it into something so much more revealing about human nature. By walking us through the two lawsuits that Facebook co-creator, Mark Zuckerberg (Jesse Eisenberg), was served as a result of how he went about co-creating Facebook, Sorkin is able to comment on everything Facebook touches on, directly or indirectly. Suddenly, a factual account of a civil law suit is able to expose America’s class system as still going strong, our universal fascination with gossip and popularity and the increasingly blurred difference between public and private statement. Even the inclusion of the lawsuits themselves denounce an American fascination with suing to get even, even when that means suing your best friend.

Fortunately for Sorkin’s ambitious script, David Fincher helms THE SOCIAL NETWORK and I really want to add him as my friend again after THE CURIOUS CASE OF BENJAMIN BUTTON made me hide him from my news feed. (Kidding, David Fincher is not my friend in any capacity). Fincher has this one though. He has an incredible awareness of the implications being made by the actions and accents the perfect moments to prove the points subtly and effectively. He also drives brave, brazen performances from his three young stars. Justin Timberlake shows dramatic depth as Sean Parker, the creator of Napster. Andrew Garfield finally shows me why I should give him any notice as Facebook co-creator, Eduardo Saverin. And Eisenberg, an actor that is oft criticized for being one note, takes what is now his signature whip of a tongue and infuses it with a strong sense of character and understanding. He plays Zuckerberg as an unstoppable force, driven by a deep-rooted self-hatred. You want to hate the guy yourself but Eisenberg makes it so you think twice before you do.

One of my original arguments for not joining Facebook was that I thought it enforced a horrible falsehood. People could remain close virtually and keep up with loved ones without making any actual effort to be a real part of their lives. It would drive us further apart while making us feel like we were getting closer. THE SOCIAL NETWORK proves me wrong though. This fantastic and fascinating piece of filmmaking will unite us all through the one thing all 500 million of us can relate to, our love/hate relationships with Facebook. And by breaking it all down, he manages to find the heart behind the screen.

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